


Like a Heart in My Chest

by NaliaRenegade



Category: Final Fantasy VI
Genre: Angst, Community: ff_exchange, Community: ff_land, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-19
Updated: 2012-05-19
Packaged: 2017-11-05 14:58:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/407770
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NaliaRenegade/pseuds/NaliaRenegade
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sabin and Celes spend a few nights of contemplation in The World of Ruin.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Like a Heart in My Chest

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Person](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Person/gifts).



> Prompt:  
> Celes/Sabin, set (or at least starting) during that period in the World of Ruin where they're the only members of the party. Something that's all desperation and co-dependence twisted up around the fact that for all they know they're the only two members of the group left alive.

The first time Celes saw him, her heart stuttered and gasped in her chest because she wasn't alone anymore. Finding the others was possible. It was why she faced her hatred of fire and ran into the building with him.

Afterwards, her heart calmed down. She was too burned. She was too tired. The ice under her skin melted before it had a chance to soothe her burns, much like the time when she was younger and messing with Terra. Terra had gotten upset and yelled at her. It was the first time she used her fire on another person. Celes highly doubted that the burning house would care as much as Terra had. When Terra realized what she had done, she cried. It was hard to get her to stop the tears. Kefka had laughed delightedly. Or was that later? Celes honestly couldn't remember anymore. It may not even have happened at all.

"Hey," Sabin said softly. "Are you okay? You're crying." He reached out and softly brushed her tears away.

This was another reason she hated fire. Her tears never froze after being burned, they leaked out of her eyes like unwanted oil. It was salty and made her face hurt. Often times, like now, her face had also gotten burned. Tears on burned flesh hurts.

"It's nothing. I just hate fire."

Sabin looked at her and nodded. He scooped something into his hands and began rubbing it on her burns. She winced and pulled away at first, but he held her fast. Soon the pain from his touch numbed, as did the pain caused by the fire.

"Why?"

Sabin blinked. "Why what?"

Celes was silent for a while. Sabin returned to rubbing burn balm into her skin. They sat in comfortable silence for a time until Sabin spoke up.

"You're skin is cold."

"It's my magic. Ice. My natural element. The element of the esper they killed to make me a weapon."

"It explains why you didn't get burned as badly."

Celes looked at him quizzically. "Not as badly? I am much more-"

She stopped when he showed her his own burns. It explained why he had not used any of the balm himself. It had burned to the point where his nerves were exposed and his flesh black and bloodied.

She gasped and came over. "Why didn't you tell me?" She demanded.

Sabin said, "I couldn't feel it. When I did I figured since it was in such a small area-"

"Sabin," She cut him off. "That burn is all up your arm."

Sabin said, "There isn't much that can be done. So I just wrapped it and-"

"Magic?"

There was a beat of silence. He blinked. She waited.

"Oh."

Celes opened her mouth and then sighed. She dumped out some of her water canteen onto a bandage and started to clean it. Her stomach turned, not because of the wound, but because of the sound Sabin made as he tried to strangle his own scream. He tensed and shut his eyes tight.

"So," He panted. "If you could use magic to heal it. Why didn't you use it on yourself?"

Celes rolled her eyes, "It wasn't that bad. I've had worse."

Sabin said, "That's not healthy."

"Neither is just ignoring the pain."

"I never said it was."

There was silence.

After Sabin was healed and he had convinced her to use magic on herself. They settled back under the stars.

Sabin said, "The sky is different."

Celes looked up. She had never noticed. Perhaps it was because she never paid the stars much attention up until then. Perhaps it was because she had never cared before. Or perhaps it was because she had been told never to care. Whatever the case, now that she was paying attention, she could understand what Sabin meant. Her favorite star, the one little Terra used to point at and make up stories about, was missing. The big bright star in the sky. Did Kefka do it? Had he really become a god to the point where he could command the stars? The moon seemed intact, which was odd because Kefka hated the moon. He used to say that was why people went crazy. Maybe he had found solace in it now that he was crazy.

She heard a shaky sigh and looked at her steadfast companion. She could see his tears glisten, an utter sadness taking over his expression. It scared her. Sabin didn't cry. She had never known him to cry. He was strong and stubborn, even in this new broken world. He wasn't allowed to cry.

Celes reached over and gently wiped the tears from his face. He blinked and sucked in a breath, trying to suppress his emotions. It wasn't right. He wasn't allowed to cry, but hiding how he felt was wrong, it made her stomach twist. She wrapped arms around him, then stayed like that.

There was silence.

"You're cold." He said softly.

"I'm sorry." She tried to pull away, but Sabin held her tighter.

"It's nice. My skin is healed, but I can still feel the burning."

She blinked and then held him closer, as close as she could get him. He was her other anchor in this world. The first one was the blue bandana and then there was Sabin. He gave her hope and together they would find the others.

They ended up staying like that for the rest of the night, as would become habit. She clutched him, trying to will her cold to take away his pain, trying to ease the own pain deep in her heart.

 

***

Emptiness. Like Duncan said his mind should be when meditating, except with a sense of horrible foreboding. As if one could feel the murmurs of lost souls under one’s skin. Sabin could feel it, could feel the loss echoing in the soul of the woman across from him, could feel his own loss deep inside of him.

It scared him.

Sabin didn’t know if Edgar was alive, or, were he living, if he could find his twin again. The world was so broken, who knew? The only thing he knew, was he had to keep looking, had to keep doing good things for the people of this world, had to keep giving Celes reason to hope.

He dreaded what would happen were she to lose hope again. He would probably lose her. And then he’d be alone again.

Sabin turned his eyes from the landscape to his companion. This woman, was stronger than all of them combined. She had even less reason to keep fighting and yet she did. She grew up with magic and death living at her fingertips, and still she could keep sane and moral.

The question left his mouth, before he could think twice.

“Why aren’t you crazy like Kefka?”

There was a beat of silence.

Celes moved her gaze from the fire to him and frowned. Then she looked at her fingers and cocked her head to the side – a more somber version of Terra’s own gesture, he thinks.

And then finally, “Because of Cid. Because of him, I grew up with magic instead of having magic consume me. I am ice. But ice isn’t always something bad. I vaguely remember him telling me that. Then he gave me a popsicle. I didn’t understand until Terra unfroze that patch of snow while she was sleeping and there a flower bloomed beside her. I don’t know. Kefka he-“

Her eyes filled then, with a sudden familiar sadness; the same sadness Sabin felt when he came upon Edgar in their bed, debauched and hollowed eyed, convinced that he had been filling some emptiness in his soul. Sabin reached out and put a hand on her shoulder.

“Thank you.”

Celes looked surprised and then covered her eyes tightly, shoulders shaking.

He held her and looked out into the vast emptiness before them. He had to prove that there was more than just that, even if it was only in their hearts. Hope. Purpose. He had to find it again and then show it to everyone else.

They ended up staying like for the rest of the night. Sometimes he wondered what would happen if one of them didn't end up breaking, would they still hold each other all night long?

 


End file.
